Tight Living

The old joke begins with "My house is so small . . ." and everyone is supposed to respond "How small is it?" Usually, I answered with the 700 square foot "doll house" in which we lived in Colorado. In reality that house was small--even for two people a cat and a dog. It was a five room wonder, but snug as a bug in the snow. One of the things that always amazed me was the size of the kitchen. If I needed to move to the sink from the stove and the husband happened to be in there also he had to leave the room so I could move from sink to stove.

We thought life was really rough--after all he had to move to the table for me to cook.

The problem was that when we had company (like my family) working in the kitchen was like a dance. I wish I could say a ballet--beautiful, balanced, carefully choreographed--so that amazing results take place in small spaces. However, I suspect to outsiders we looked more like the Keystone Cops, awkward, bumbling, running into each other, turning into each other, etc.--no wonder my spicy food kept getting hotter. Every time I added chili powder and got bumped, twice the amount I meant to add--got added. That can make for tight living.

Lately it has been tight living between me and God. My living space is so small that God takes it all and there just doesn't seem room for me to maneuver comfortably in my space. I know God is supposed to exist within, but frankly

God has been invading a bit too much of my space lately.

At a recent meeting I responded to a question that "I gave up Lent for Lent!" I happen to be tired of deep introspection, theological reflection, and consideration of the passion of Christ, etc. for a while. I just want to have laughs, everything be easy, smile and take on the "don't worry--be happy" attitude. Come on God--give me some space!

Grief dwells within with each loss. A beloved family member dies and the grief twists tight within me. A job opportunity does not develop and anger twists with frustration filling my internal space. Everything feels tight. It is harder to breath . . . harder to move about . . . harder to live in that personal space. However, I have discovered allowing God space within--especially during the hard times, actually creates more space within my soul.

God, dwelling within, actually removes the hardened, space-clogging aspects of my life. The tight living with God makes more space within my soul--space for love and compassion; space for others rather than myself; space for pondering the ways of God rather than chaffing over the injustices of this world. Tight living with God ultimately forms me more like God and less like self.

It isn't that tight after all. There is lots of space for the fruit of the spirit. "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control" (Galatians 5:22-23, NIV). That is a lot in a tight space. Maybe if I move love and joy to the left, peace and patience to the right, I could squeeze a little more kindness in with the goodness so I can reach for the . . . .

God, help us realize that there is no such thing as too tight a space where you are concerned. You are the source of endless space dwelling within us. Your love living through us has no bounds. So be it. Amen.