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Thursday, May 23, 2013
Bad TV NightPosted Wednesday, May 7, 2008, at 9:57 PM
Whatever happened to good television programming? I got home from a meeting tonight to find some creepy guy stalking a girl on "Criminal Minds" and a head-banging Rocker screaming on "American Idol." Oh, goody...
I called my sister in Springfield to commisserate with her about my two crummy channels, and she gave me the top 15 choices on the 50 channels she gets on cable:
1. CBS - "Criminal Minds"- "Team searches for Traveling Stalker."
2. FOX - "American Idol" - teenie bopper fare
3. ABC - "Super Nanny" - Idiocy
4. NBC - "Deal or No Deal" - More idiocy
5. Rerun of CSI Miami - violence, blood, guts and gore, set among the beautiful people in Paradise...
6. 1993 Thriller - "Striking Distance" - Police Cover Up - continued violence, crime, and crummy people.
7. Animal Planet - "Life in Cold Blood: Serpents" - Great bedtime fare..
8. Poker - We watch people sitting around, playing a card game with their fingers up their noses and aces up their sleeves...
9. "Top Chef" - Last time I looked in on this, they were cutting up raw chicken. Yum, yum! What entertainment!
10. Larry King Live - ACK!
11. Wednesday Night Fights - Obnoxious fat guys beating each other to a pulp!
12. "Monster" - speaks for itself!
13. "Children of the Grave".... Do we notice a theme here??
14. "Law and Order: Special Victims Unit" - yeah, modern television is all about victims and all the details of what happens to them...
15. NBA Play Offs - Well, at last! Some good healthy entertainment, but if you aren't into sports....
Not a single cheery program among the lot - unless you count that nanny thing..
Why bother having the writers back, if we're still gonna be faced with stuff like this? If the TV networks are giving people what they want, then we've come to a sorry state of affairs in this nation.
Most of the time, I'd rather watch some of the commercials. They're better written than the programs. The Capital One writers should take over "Criminal Minds." Maybe we could get the Marauders back. I loved those guys - especially the one who swung from the Christmas garland!
Or those incredible dancing lizards on the "Life Water" commercial, dancing to "Thriller" - "Dancing with the Stars" could be "Dancing with the Lizards.."
Then there's the Jello commercial where the mannikans come to life, jump out of the clothing store window and dance! So well done!
Or the back-to-school commercial where those 3 cute little boys dance with their backpacks in the hall...
Mmmm...do I seem to be on a dancing kick? Anything to lighten things up out here on a dark night! Where's the Geiko gecko when ya need him??
Matt Dillon, where did you go??
Okay, some of the early "Gunsmoke" episodes were pretty grim, but as Marshall Dillon aged and got stronger, the episodes settled down into a comfortable rhythmn: Matt has to leave Dodge on some errand. Bad guys come into town and terrorize the inhabitants - particularly Miss Kitty. Festus rides out to find him. Matt returns and kicks butt!
Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh! Peace, security, serenity.....We all go to bed happy!
Not all "progress" is progress...
I guess I need to pop an old movie in the VCR about 8 o'clock each night..."Casablanca"..."Pride and Prejudice"...
From the incredibly dark hills of Tillman, this is your increasingly obsolete rural journalist, Madeline, signing off.....
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Madeline DeJournett is the Advance writer for the North Stoddard Countian. A retired high school English/history teacher, she spent 32 years teaching in 5 schools in Missouri and Alaska. These days, she lives quietly with a menagerie of wild and domestic animals on 52 secluded acres in the remote Tillman hills south of Advance. She can be contacted at email@example.com or by phone at 573-722-5322.