Conspiracy theories keep journalist awake at night
Yes, I know I promised myself that I would stick to nice, safe topics like tomatoes and blackberries and other fruits, after getting myself embroiled in politics awhile back - but I had an interview yesterday that gave me some trouble getting to sleep last night... Or maybe it was that wild lightning about midnight. My tomato blog hasn't turned out to be such a nice, safe place, anyway. Who knew tomatoes could provoke controversy?? Well, just wait'll you hear this.
I won't reveal the name of the person I was interviewing, but, needless to say, conspiracies were not the original topic. However, these subjects soon took over the conversation, leaving me sitting with notebook in hand, mouth open, eyes popping, and mind reeling. There were three mind-boggling conspiracy theories which dominated what was supposed to be a normal conversation. I will present these wild ideas in order of severity (and alarm):
1) "Chemtrails" are lines of vapor or smoke, which look like "contrails," those jet stream thingamajiggers that come from jets, as they criss cross across the sky. However, there is purportedly a much more sinister reason for chemtrails. Hold on, now. Here it comes....(Take a deep breath.) According to a website (ahhh...there's the evil origin of so many wild ideas)called "educate-yourself.org," these chemtrails are government-sponsored chemical sprayings of our cities, designed to reduce the world population by 4 billion people by the year 2050. (I notice that most of the conspiracies will mention a specific year.) According to this theory, our government is "under the total domination and control of the Illuminati (architects of the so-called New World Order)." Why it is that "The New World Order" wants to eliminate the earth's population is unclear... (or maybe it was explained in the part I missed after I got sick and quit reading...)
2) No website for this one, but during the interview, it was suggested that the Katrina disaster was actually engineered by the U.S. government just to "test" some sort of amazing technology. The logic of this theory eludes me... Sounds like a Superman or Batman comic book - Lex Luthar...or maybe the Joker..
3) The most alarming of all the theories poured into my mind yesterday was the idea that some scientists and geologists are predicting a 3-degree shift of the Earth on its axis in the year 2012. This shift, like the ones that have happened before (dinosaur extinction...extreme and suddent climate change), will cause the earth - as we know it - to completely change. From what I gathered in the interview, a large part of the North American continent will be under water. Those of us who live near the Mississippi River will be in particularly bad straits, as most of the land mass where we now live will be gone.
To say that I feel "in over my head" on this topic is an understatement and a pretty lame pun. I have some researchers working on the subject as we speak, so maybe I can eventually progress beyond STUN AND SHOCK to some sort of INTELLIGENT ENLIGHTENMENT. I know there is something going on with the melting of the polar ice caps, so the third theory is particularly worrisome. As for the first two, they just seem ridiculous and easily dismissed.
Okay, tomato bloggers, mull these topics around a bit and see what kind of stew you can come up with.
This is your rural Tillman ex-goatherder, Madeline, wishing she had stayed on the farm yesterday...
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"Average temperatures in the Arctic region are rising twice as fast as they are elsewhere in the world. Arctic ice is getting thinner, melting and rupturing. For example, the largest single block of ice in the Arctic, the Ward Hunt Ice Shelf, had been around for 3,000 years before it started cracking in 2000. Within two years it had split all the way through and is now breaking into pieces.
The polar ice cap as a whole is shrinking. Images from NASA satellites show that the area of permanent ice cover is contracting at a rate of 9 percent each decade. If this trend continues, summers in the Arctic could become ice-free by the end of the century."
Well, it's such a painful topic that I've been avoiding a blog on the subject -- besides, with the advent of certain headbanger types on our website, I knew I'd have to put up with massive ridicule....... I guess my next blog should take care of that sad saga.
What the heck? I've written about tomatoes and conspiracy theories and hula hoops and blackberries and kudzu and Barack Obama... so I guess I can tackle one last goat blog...