Armadillos--go home!

This is the disgusting job I found awaiting me, when I returned from vacation. That's an empty dog food bag that I am using to transport the dead armadillo to the dumpster. The deer skull with attached antlers will probably hang around in the yard, while I decide what to do with it. It was a four-pointer, so my son doesn't want it. We have no idea how it died, but I am not happy about it!

Gifts from the dogs

Several mornings ago, I found another dead armadillo in my front yard. The pathetic armored animal was right out there with several assorted deer parts--particularly skulls--which my dogs have dragged down from the woods to play with, while I was gone to Florida.

I guess they figured that they deserved a good time, since I was obviously having one, too.

I know I've said it before--but why are armadillos armored, if it isn't going to protect them any better than it does? My dogs seem to have no trouble whatsoever in burrowing through the armor to tear into the animals' innards.

It would be different if they would EAT the creature--as they do with rabbits, ground hogs, and squirrels. But, no--they just play all night with the creature, kill it, and leave it for me to dispose of in the morning.

Why couldn't these intruders from the South have just stayed where they belong? Do they really have a good, sound reason for moving north? Why would any animal in its right mind move NORTH? Do they actually enjoy cold weather?

These questions only raise more questions. Where do my dogs find the armadillos that they drag into my yard? I cannot believe that my yard is a world-wide destination for armadillos, known far and wide as an absolute Armadillo Paradise, where these supposedly nocturnal creatures will find all the delightful grubs that their hearts desire.

I can only assume that my three dogs comb the fields and hills around my house, in search of diverse slow-moving creatures to chase, kill and drag up into my yard.

Or, do they herd the creatures into my yard--and then kill them?

Just what could be the method in their madness? "Find, attack, herd, kill?" or is it "Find, attack, kill, drag into Mama's yard?"

While I was gone on vacation, I heard that the dogs killed a squirrel and then left it neatly stretched out across my welcome mat, as if they were presenting me with a gift.

Could all these armadillos be gifts that my dogs are bringing to curry my favor?

I don't think so! I think that all this destruction of resident wildlife is just their own sick idea of fun.

When they can't find armadillos, they obviously go out in search of deer parts with which, I suspect, they are going to assemble their own articulated deer.

The beauty of this devious doggy plot is that, unlike the armadillo, the deer parts are actually good to eat! In fact, the deer are so delicious that I should probably save money and quit buying dog food.