Hot and Blind
I only wish that I was referring to 'hot' in terms of today's connotation and have mistakenly interjected "blind" when I intended "blonde," but no such luck, girls.
No one ever told me that with 50-something comes loss of eyesight and intermittent waves of what can only be described as "a little taste of hell."
And who stole my language? I'm in mid-sentence and the words leave me, absolutely leave me. It doesn't matter though, because by the time I retrieve the stolen word, I have totally lost the subject matter at hand anyway.
My arms are no longer long enough to extend to the length that I can recognize a word in print before me. I never understood why "older" people had to look above and then through those half glasses. I know now. And one would think that given all the exercise I get by extending my arms in order to read, it might lesson the "wings" that I seem to have developed in that area. Given a little propeller assistance and an airstrip, I believe I could take off and land successfully. Is there a cure? Or an end?
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My nap is over! I'm feeling revived, so will post a new entry as we "speak." I was in the mood for "True Confessions," (Oh, remember that smut magazine of the 60's!!) Anyway, I was reading Lufer newcomer's comment on "senior moments" and was reminded of a few, although I had to call one of my children to remind me of just how they transpired. It's REALLY bad when you can't even recall your own senior moments, but once the memory was refreshed, I felt the need to "expound," so I attempted to relay a couple of encounters of late. One I never thought I'd go public with, but I'm throwing caution to the wind. It comes with the whole "age thing." Caution goes right along with the mind and body.
We must have a few years on Lufer. I was going right along with Tom Hanks being in Ground Hog Day. But, forget who Robert Redford is? Never! Does anyone recall the old movie, "The Sting?" An old favorite, but not as good as Camelot or Funny Girl. My goal in life in '68 was to grow fingernails like Barbra Streisand. Then I saw Camelot and feared I'd have to go into the convent like Gweneviere...and I don't think they let nuns have fingernails that long. SO, I just grew old with short nails and no habit. (Well, I've got some habits, but not the long black and white ones that are worn with a helmet).
Minnie herself would go for the man in a pink shirt backdropped by a yellow Rolls...don't much care if he's 4 foot, 5"...suddenly against that backdrop, he looks about 6' 4".
Now, pink pants are another story altogether. Recently saw a man in them at a golf tournament who thought he could pull it off...he didn't. And why he bothered even trying is beyond me. I've heard it said, "It takes a real man to wear a pink shirt." And haven't seen one in a pink shirt yet that I thought didn't earn the right, but the pants are another realm entirely. Men need not try...no matter the number of Rolls in the backdrop, just don't go there, guys...it makes you look (for lack of a better word), ridiculous.
And I second gt's sentiments..."as if they really existed."
The King (who I believe is still alive and walking the aisles of the local Dollar General) did indeed wear pink shirts, but I don't recall him in pink pants. That's where we draw the line.
Now, you have really started some trips down the old Memory Lane with the mention of "True Story." I remember it well. Smut of the 60's and never to be left on a coffee table for the bridge club to view, for sure. Remember the pictures on the cover of the housewife dressed to the hilt in high heels, much like June Cleaver, perhaps with a letter from an illicit lover clutched to her cleavage (sorry, June) while a suspecting spouse, with eyebrows furrowed, is approaching from behind? Oh, the drama!
And not one off color word in the entire text of the magazine, as I recall (not that I ever actually read the stories, mind you). Actually, I was so innocent that if there had been any off color words, I wouldn't have recognized them. (and there are a few I probably still wouldn't...I think that's probably a good thing).